As I am trying to come up with a title for this posting, I am more wondering as to what have I have been thinking about. Or for that matter even dreaming about so keep in mind with this posting as in others, the views that I express may more be an inner feeling more than how I am truly feeling.
For the past few nights as I lay awake and wonder if the path that I am heading is the direct path, I do not sense of peace I do not sense a comfort, could this be sings as that I am going down the wrong direction? Or could this be more of an uncomfortable feeling that I can not seem to shake? I have not been my self I have been more in a different space. I feel as if it is an alternative reality looking through the world through ‘ rose coloured glasses”. But yet not seeing the posative only negative. What has caused this feeling to come upon me as of late? Why this sudden mixed emotion? Those are questions that I can not seem to answer.
I try and seek Your word for wisdom or for a window open, but alas I can not seem to find that. Give me the fire that I once had, give me the direction that You want me to venture towards, don’t leave me alone and scared.’I gotta keep singing gotta keep praising Your name You’re the one who’s keeping my heart beating I gotta keep singing I gotta keep praising Your name
That’s the only way that I’ll find healing” But through that I still feel scared and alone, yes Christ is in my life and knows every thought before we even think it or say it, but yet He still gives us these trials to go through. To test our faith to see how devoted we are? I know never say the Lord is tempting us, but at times is this not what it feels like?
Then out of nowhere like a flash of lighting, brought back to the reality that we are meant to go through hard times. But are we ever alone? Are we meant to go through hard times even though we have people beside us able to reach out to. but not knowing how? Not knowing how to ask for help without making it seem like nothing is wrong. Where do we start, where does the trust factor start? How does trust work what does it look like? Happy Reading Adam
I know there are people that i can trust but at times it seems hard to open up when ‘you” do not know what is going on for sure.